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Joke !

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sherlock
Posts: 181
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2016 9:54 pm

Re: Joke !

Post by sherlock »

wheelsoflife.jpg
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am a froggy, nobody is perfect

1934 BSA three wheeler - 1968 Daimler 250 V8 - 1993 Daimler XJ40 Majestic LWB
Image

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sherlock
Posts: 181
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2016 9:54 pm

Re: Joke !

Post by sherlock »

A guy sends a text to his next-door neighbor:

"Bob, I'm sorry. I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess: I have been helping myself to your wife when you're not around, probably more than you. I know it's no excuse but I don't get it at home. I can't live with the guilt any longer. I hope you'll accept my sincerest apology. It won't happen again."

Feeling outrage and betrayed, Bob grabs his gun, goes into the bedroom, and without a word, shoots his wife.

Moments later the guy gets a second text:

"Really should use spell check! That should be 'wifi'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am a froggy, nobody is perfect

1934 BSA three wheeler - 1968 Daimler 250 V8 - 1993 Daimler XJ40 Majestic LWB
Image

Phillmore
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Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 1:25 pm
Location: Worcestershire Herefordshire border

Re: Joke !

Post by Phillmore »

I like that
Andy

1954 Conquest Mk1, 1956 Conquest Mk2, 1957 Conquest Century Mk2, 1955 Austin A90 Westminster

Stan Thomas
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Location: Penkridge. Staffs.

Re: Joke !

Post by Stan Thomas »

Reports are coming in that a Japanees cargo plane loaded with gearbox parts was struck by lightning and exploded somewhere over France during a severe storm.

Police who rushed to the scene said the weather was atrocious, and it was raining Datsun cogs.

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sherlock
Posts: 181
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2016 9:54 pm

Re: Joke !

Post by sherlock »

Stan Thomas wrote:Police who rushed to the scene said the weather was atrocious, and it was raining Datsun cogs.



Image
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am a froggy, nobody is perfect

1934 BSA three wheeler - 1968 Daimler 250 V8 - 1993 Daimler XJ40 Majestic LWB
Image

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sherlock
Posts: 181
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2016 9:54 pm

Re: Joke !

Post by sherlock »

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband :
"You know, I was a fool when I married you"
The husband replied :
"Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am a froggy, nobody is perfect

1934 BSA three wheeler - 1968 Daimler 250 V8 - 1993 Daimler XJ40 Majestic LWB
Image

dansdaimler
Posts: 155
Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 3:18 pm
Location: France (53)/USA (L.A.)

Re: Joke !

Post by dansdaimler »

As the husband came downstairs into the kitchen for breakfast, his wife suddenly says "quick, we need to make love right now" so they did, right there in the kitchen. When they where finished, the husband turns to his wife and says "what was that about?" Of which she replied "the egg timer is broken!"
Daniel
1962 Daimler SP250

Vortex O'Plinth
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Re: Joke !

Post by Vortex O'Plinth »

Taking a wee break from the golf course, a famous american golfer was on tour in Ireland where he wasn't well known. He drove a borrowed Daimler Double Six into a fuel station. An attendant greets him with typical Irish hospitality, unaware who the golf pro is: "Top o' the mornin' to ya." he beams.

As the golfer gets out of the car two tees fall out of his pocket.

"So what are those things, boyo?" asks the attendant.

"They're called tees," replies the golfer.

"And what would ya be usin' them for, now?" inquires the Irishman.

"Well, they're for resting my balls on when I drive" replies the golf pro.

"Aw, Jaysus, Mary an' Joseph!" exclaims the attendant.

"Those fellas at Daimler t'ink of everything!"
Nick

"Don't bother with the Air & Space Museum - there's nothing to see.......".

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captain bobo
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Location: Kimbolton, Cambs

Re: Joke !

Post by captain bobo »

No offence intended to anyone:-

The Japanese have invented a camera with such an incredibly fast shutter speed that it has taken a photo of a lady with her mouth shut.
Best wishes, Dave B

Phillmore
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Location: Worcestershire Herefordshire border

Re: Joke !

Post by Phillmore »

All very good, keep them coming
Andy

1954 Conquest Mk1, 1956 Conquest Mk2, 1957 Conquest Century Mk2, 1955 Austin A90 Westminster

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